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Rejection of a child!

More people in the world suffer from rejection than would like to admit; human beings will go to great lengths to be accepted and even greater lengths to avoid rejection.

It is the most common emotional wound people sustain in daily life. The reality is we all have faced rejection at some point in time, in this journey called LIFE! 

But how we deal with rejection may, if not dealt with inflict damage to our psychological well-being; that goes well beyond mere emotional pain determining more about your future because of the decisions you make.

Unfortunately, adults are not the only ones prone to experience Rejection.  Our children are disposed to experience rejection, especially in stages where they are  young and have not fully come into the knowledge of their identity. Now we cannot protect our children from pain or the possibility of disappointment that can lead to feeling rejected; but we can create an environment to overcome and give them the necessary tools to go over one hurdle and face the other. 

Living in a society where we have taught our children that everyone is “winner” and there are no “losers” is good and bad, to the emotional well-being of our children. In one hand there is no child left behind, but in the other children are having a difficult time with the natural progression of reality that tells them “although you say I have not lost l still did not win?!”. Leaving them confused about their emotions and concluding on their perceptions. 

Situations that can cause children to harbor Rejection: 

 -Through the womb- a mother could have been raped, drug dependent, the fetus was unwanted for many reasons

-From an unstable early family structure 

-Self-blaming because of divorce of parents

– Bullying of peers

– Extreme conditions of poverty

– Fear or anxiety of the unknown

– Adoption from a young age

– Being raised in the ‘system’ and never truly belonging 

– Parental style that doesn’t match a child’s personality 

– Loss of something very important to them 

– Excessive social media and screen time creating a fantasy world 

– Consistent judgment from loved one 

– Sexual, physical and emotional abuse 

How do you know if they are rejected? 

–  They isolate

–  Self-blaming 

–  Anger

–  Self-sabotage of relationships with peers

–  Performance oriented

–  Perfectionism that can be crippling

–  Abnormal desire for love or looking for it in the wrong place 

–  Consistent desire to hear about their self-worth 

–  One or both parents struggle with rejection 

–  Consistently feel defeated 

–  They don’t take loosing very well

–   Overly emotional will cry over anything 

–  Low self esteem

–  Anger 

–  Extreme rebellion

Conclusion:

LOVE HEALS! Being intentional to create a loving and accepting environment. There is nothing that Love cannot heal. Love has the ability to change fear into courage, hopelessness into hope, sadness into joy and so on. Love has the ability to correct mistakes that have been made in the past, leaving a child fully healed and resembling nothing from their past. This is why children who have been rejected at birth, can be adopted into a family that does nothing but passionately pour out their love on them and these children grow up to be emotional, physically and spiritually successful. Love heals the entire being and makes a wrong right.

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